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12 Subtle Behaviors You Exhibit Due to Being Raised by Strict Parents

If you were raised by strict parents, you might remember rigid rules, plentiful consequences for errant behavior, and emotional expression deemed as being frivolous and unnecessary. To deal with these ever-changing demands, you most likely developed coping mechanisms to help navigate yourself through adolescence and into adulthood. As an adult, you probably now realize some behaviors that once served you seem inappropriate or misplaced in your current life. Do you think some of your habits are a result of strict parents? Following is a list of actions you may not even realize you do as a result of growing up with strict parents.

1. Over-Apologizing

Constantly apologizing, even for things that are not your fault, is an easy trap to fall into. Children raised by strict parents often find themselves in environments where even minor mistakes, such as forgetting to turn the lights off when leaving a room, are met with criticism or punishment. As a child, you may have trained yourself to apologize quickly and often to forego any perceived conflict. Apologizing also allows you to take full responsibility and leave other people free of guilt.

2. Difficulty Saying No

Setting boundaries or saying no may invoke immediate fear of conflict or rejection. If your parents were strict, they may have expected you to obey every rule, no questions asked. As an adult, you may feel uncomfortable asserting yourself or saying "no," fearing that if you do not comply with someone’s wishes you will hurt their feelings or somehow end the friendship. You may also feel guilty about asserting your own needs, having been conditioned to prioritize obedience over your own wants and desires.

3. Seeking Constant Validation From Anyone and Everyone

Everyone loves a compliment, but when you go out of your way to brag about your accomplishments or post attention-seeking selfies on social media in the hopes of getting a plethora of likes, the validation may mean more to you than you realize. If you had to work hard to receive any sort of praise or accolades as a child, you may not have learned to derive a sense of self-worth from within.

4. Avoiding Confrontation

Disagreements and confrontation are unavoidable in life. Conflict helps us grow and learn from each other. If you shy away from any disagreements or assertive dialogue, you may have developed this trait because you were raised in a strict environment. Strict parents often do not allow room for discussions or questions about the rules they have set, and any attempt to question the rules might have been met with punishment. Adults who were raised in this type of environment have a heightened sensitivity to conflict and often avoid it at all costs. Many people even suppress their own opinions or emotions and agree with others just for the sake of avoiding an argument.

5. Perfectionism

It’s great to want to produce your best work every time. Buildings are built, monuments erected, and beautiful art is created by people who have high standards in life. But if you strive for perfection and are overly self-critical to the point where you can never finish a task, you may be driven by a need to meet certain stipulations that were impressed upon you at a young age. The intense pressure to succeed can sometimes be too much, causing some people to never feel their tasks are completed unless everything is 100% perfect.

6. Over-Explaining Themselves

We have all had to clear up a misunderstanding from time to time. Words or actions are misconstrued, and we have to explain what we really meant. If you find yourself over-explaining your every word or action to others, this may be a result of being raised by strict parents. If you were raised having to abide by unwavering rules, any deviation from the rules might have been met with criticism or punishment. You may have found yourself constantly justifying your actions and explaining reasons for your behavior to avoid consequences. This is a habit that can easily carry over into adulthood, as you could perceive that everyone you come in contact with is constantly judging or criticizing you.

7. High Alertness to Authority Figures

We have all been taught to respect our elders, right? Respecting your elders and being hyper-anxious when anyone of authority comes in your vicinity are two different things. In a strict household, parents often portrayed themselves as the rulemakers and the only voice of authority. You subconsciously learned to fear authority, associating punishments and consequences with disappointing the authority figures in your life. As an adult, this can lead to a hyper-awareness of authority figures and the need to constantly be on your best behavior.

8. People-Pleasing Tendencies

Treat others like you want to be treated is often touted as the Golden Rule, but at what point do you have to draw the line? Putting others’ needs and wants over your own in the hopes of making everyone else happy is a sign of growing up in a strict household. You may have learned that compliance and pleasing your parents was the surest way to avoid punishment or conflicts. As an adult, you may find it hard to shake the people-pleasing tendencies that are ingrained in you.

9. Difficulty Trusting Your Own Judgment

Making decisions, even minor ones, can be difficult if you were never allowed the freedom to do so when you were a kid. If your parents were strict, they didn’t leave much room for you to decide what to wear or what kind of food to eat. Now that you have the freedom to make decisions on your own, it can be more difficult to trust your own judgment if you never had to rely on yourself before. This trait often follows children through adolescence and into adulthood.

10. Suppressed Emotions

As humans, we feel an array of emotions throughout the day. We may feel frustrated at the traffic on our commute to work, then arrive at the office feeling nervous about our annual performance review, and then feel sad that the review did not go as well as we anticipated. If you grew up with strict parents, they may not have acknowledged their emotions and may not have allowed you to express yours either. Strict parents often see frustration, anxiety, and sadness as emotions that are private, and displaying these emotions could be considered disrespectful or unacceptable. Children who were not allowed to express their emotions when they were young learn to hide their emotions. This suppression can carry over into adulthood, making it hard for adults to process or express their feelings properly.

11. Over-Preparation for Possible Scenarios

It’s normal to have a little bit of fear when embarking on a new journey. When going on a first date, you may feel butterflies in your stomach. When taking a road trip, you may pack extra snacks in case you and your passengers get hungry. Over-preparing for every possible scenario that might or might not happen, however, often stems from having overly strict parents. A rigid upbringing often creates a fear of being caught off guard and a need to stay in control no matter the circumstances. This over-preparation can manifest as excessive planning, anxiety about small details, or constantly anticipating worst-case scenarios, all as a way to feel secure in uncertain situations.

12. Fear of Failure

While some may see inevitable failures as a learning experience, those of us who were raised with strict parents may see failure as completely unacceptable. Often people who grew up in a strict environment have a heightened fear of making mistakes because the punishment for said mistakes was so severe. This fear of failure and punishment can be a mental block against completing the task at hand, and even the simplest errands can get put on the back burner.

Your Child Can Change the World by Learning to Code

Think back to the days when you were in high school. You were assigned research papers and had to use an actual book to look up information and cite your sources. You wanted to talk to your best friend during class, but she was sitting across the room from you. How did you contact her? Not by sending a text message, of course, but by passing a note across the room. Fast forward to today, when most households have multiple smartphones, computers, and video game consoles within. Amazon’s Alexa has taken the world by storm, allowing you to control the music, lighting, and temperature of your home, simply by calling out a request without even leaving the comfort of your couch. In a relatively short amount of time, technology has completely changed the way we accomplish everyday tasks and activities, as well as how we interact with each other, and our lives will only continue to change at a rapid pace as new developments take place. To keep up with the fast-paced world in which we live today, there are several reasons why it is imperative for kids to learn coding.

1.Coding Prepares Kids for Future Careers

Coding is a skill that is in high demand today. Not everyone can code, and those who can are looked upon favorably by employers, as coding is a skill that sets one job candidate apart from another. Think about your current job. Who do you call when you have a problem with the computer, the copier, or the printer? The IT department, of course. These employees most likely have knowledge of coding and are often sought-after in the workplace.

2. Coding Develops New Products

Coding is a skill that is necessary for the development of new technological items that are designed to make our lives easier. Objects that allow you to remotely lock and unlock your front door, start your car from inside your house, or give a command that turns on the ceiling fan are all made possible by the invention of smart devices. As our lives get busier and we take on more tasks, the ability to save time by preheating the oven on the way home from work or programming our coffee maker to start before we are even out of bed can make our lives much less stressful. Thus, knowing how to code and understanding how these devices work can be a significant factor in making the daily routine run much smoother.

3. Coding Improves Intelligence

Knowledge of computer/technology lingo is paramount to thriving in today’s society. Children are learning to use IPads, Kindles, and smartphones at younger and younger ages. Using these types of technology gives kids a head-start in school and exposes them to materials that are beneficial to education. Understanding coding will help kids comprehend and appreciate how these devices work.

4. Understanding Coding Gives Kids a Feeling of Accomplishment

How great is that feeling when you finally decipher the answer to something that has been puzzling you? Imagine the sense of accomplishment your kids will have when they are able to program devices and use technology to benefit their lives. Programming a device to work for a friend, installing new software, or fixing a technical issue are skills that can help virtually everyone. Not only will your child be sought after by future employers, but he or she can share their coding knowledge with others around them now. The wonderful feeling that comes from helping a friend solve a problem or teaching someone a new skill is often unmatched.

5. Coding is Fun

Coding is a fun and rewarding skill set to have, and it also builds creativity. It is a proven fact that the more kids use their creativity, the more creative they will become. Kids who know how to code can create games, animations, and avatars. Your child can make those drawings come alive and can create a multitude of new scenarios and stories for their characters. The possibilities are endless, and the chance for your child to grow their imagination and creativity is priceless.

Technology is a staple in almost every industry. The language of coding will soon be so prevalent in society that those without this knowledge will be in the minority. Be it education, medicine, transportation, construction, or finance, technology is moving our lives forward at a rapid speed, and knowledge of coding and programming is vital to your child’s future success. Give your child a head start by enrolling them in an after school computer science program. At Launch, your child will learn the language of coding under the supervision of a passionate educator. The ways to integrate technology into our everyday lives are endless, and who knows what your child can develop if he or she has the opportunity.

Simple Ways to Update an Outdated House

Just like clothing and hairstyle trends change over time, house décor trends come and go as well. In the blink of an eye, paint colors become dated, furniture styles become obsolete, and light fixtures look outdated archaic. If you don’t keep up with small changes, before you know it, your entire house looks antiquated. You may feel overwhelmed at the thought of starting any type of do-it-yourself project, and hiring someone else for home renovation is typically very pricey. There are so many home improvement shows that depict home makeovers complete with new cabinetry and knocked-down walls, leading you to believe that major, costly changes are necessary to bring your home up-to-date. But before you resign yourself to never inviting friends over so you can avoid the embarrassment of having to show off your outdated living quarters, consider making a few small changes that will give your home a completely new appearance. The following suggestions are inexpensive changes that can be knocked out in a weekend, leaving you and your wallet happy.

1. Add a Fresh Coat of Paint

One way to give your home a completely new look is by adding a fresh coat of paint. Not only does paint become dull and scuffed after several years of wear and tear, but popular color schemes change frequently as well. Dark colors such as maroons and greens that were all the rave in the late nineties and early two thousands have been replaced with subtle, neutral colors. Try painting your living room a gray or taupe color, which will not only give the room a fresh look, but will make your room appear bigger, as lighter colors tend to reflect the light. Keep in mind that flat paint will typically not hold up as well, as it tends to show the small scuffs and scratches in more detail. A higher-gloss paint will be more durable for normal wear and tear. Choose an eggshell or semi-gloss finish for the living room to give your walls the most durability.

2. Hang Curtains to Make Windows Look Bigger

Large windows are trending now, and gone are the narrow, tiny windows that were favored decades ago. While changing the dimensions of your windows is not an easy (or inexpensive!) task, there are several things you can do to trick your eyes into “seeing” larger windows. Mount your curtain rods near the ceiling, above the top frame of the window. Buy panel curtains that are long enough to reach below the length of the window, almost to the floor. Your eye will see the panel that reaches from floor to ceiling, creating the illusion of height when looking at the window. Be sure that your curtain panels do not drag on the floor when hung, as this will create the illusion of shorter walls and windows. Your curtain panels should reach to just above the floor by roughly an inch. Choose a light color and fabric for an airy, fresh feel.

3. Replace Outdated Light Fixtures

Replacing outdated light fixtures is a simple way to give your home a fresh look. Not only is this an easy task, but you can replace as few or as many fixtures as you want at a time to fit your budget and decorating needs. Brighter gold and brass fixtures that were popular in the late nineties have been replaced with fixtures that have a darker, smoother finish. Simple, one-bulb light fixtures in the hallway or entryway of the home have been replaced with chandeliers and more ornate fixtures. A trendy way to update your living room is to replace bright overhead lights with softer lamps placed strategically around the room. Pair dark light fixtures with your newly painted, light-colored walls, and your home has an instant, modern facelift that will leave you feeling refreshed. When choosing light bulbs, choose a soft white lighting for bedrooms and living rooms and a brighter, white light for kitchen and bathrooms.

4. Change up Decorative Accents

Changing up your interior décor can make a world of difference when it comes to updating your home. You can grow tired of seeing the same decorations day in and day out, and even purchasing a few small new pieces will give your room a complete facelift. Changing up your decorating scheme is another task you can do a little or a lot at a time, depending on your budget. A trendy piece of art or a decorative accent can double as décor and a fun conversation piece. If you have a large wall that you are unsure what to do with, try mixing and matching decorative pieces and frames to create a unique display. Adding a pillow with a summer theme gives your room a fresh look and can be easily swapped out when the seasons change, and a new portrait can give the room a whole new feel.

5. Clear Off Countertops

A simple yet often overlooked way to take your home from outdated to trendy in no time is to clear the clutter off of your countertops. Fresh, sleek spaces are trending now, and this look can be easily achieved by removing clutter and streamlining your space. Find a home for the things that tend to overtake countertops, such as junk mail and keys. Hiding the cords to electrical gadgets and appliances is also an easy way to achieve an updated look. Be it small kitchen appliances like the coffeemaker or toaster, or larger everyday items such as the television and computer, there are cord management systems for every room in your house. Removing clutter can be made simple utilizing multi-function pieces of furniture. Invest in a kitchen island that has storage compartments to make the most of your space. By clearing the clutter and keeping smaller areas organized, your home will look and feel fresh and modernized.